April 20, 2009; 4:15 a.m.

So, here it is a couple of hours before I need to get up for the day and here I am awake (still). As usual, I am not able to go to sleep in spite of being tired due to nausea and moderate pain. I am primarily referring to pancreatic pain, but I am also referring to joint/muscle pain as well. My hips, back, shoulders, neck, and other joints have been aching on and off for several months now. I don't know if it is arthritis or just aging, but I don't think I should feel so sore. I still don't have a doctor so I guess it doesn't really matter anyway. I just would like to be able to go to bed, fall asleep at a normal time, stay asleep, and not awaken hurting. That seems to be a lot to ask. I guess I should try to update my other blog sometime. I may as well do it now since I am obviously not going to go to sleep until the end of today (which hasn't even started for most people). I am hoping that I will be able to sleep after not sleeping tonight...or is it last night now?